The Sh*t L*st

This Palin drama is too good to be true. That's why I think it's even better than that and that the latest announcement is all part of a big conspiracy to get Palin the hell off the ticket without making McCain look like an absolute complete fucking ass. He'll still look like a complete fucking ass, just not an absolute complete fucking ass.

I see I'm not alone in my theory. To quote Fresh Intelligence:

Make that 2-0 for David Perel. Fresh off his success with the John Edwards story, sources tell Radar that an aggressive 36-hour push by Perel's National Enquirer reporting team forced Alaska Governor and John McCain's vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin to announce that her 17-year-old daughter Bristol is pregnant, an announcement which effectively puts an end to the Internet rumor that Palin had faked her own pregnancy to cover up her daughter's. (Or does it? There are already conspiracy theories that this pregnancy is being faked to dispel the rumors that Trig, Palin's four-month-old, is really Bristol's child. Kinda crazy, right?)

I think the new fake cover-up pregnancy is all part of an exit strategy. Palin announces before the end of the convention that VP would be too much to juggle with her daughter's new pregnancy. She graciously and regretfully bows out while blaming the vicious attacks by radical left. Family tucks tail back to Alaska never to be heard of in the lower 48 again. McCain tries to pick up the pieces by tapping Huckabee.

Postscript: a wire story a couple months down the road, dateline Alaska, about Palin daughter's miscarriage.

Update:

Jesus Christ! Just saw this page. Here's your smoking gun: the sister-in-law's myspace page (now blocked but quoted here.)

Updated Update:
I mistook "new sister" for "niece". Not really a smoking gun, after all. Sorry. Go back to talking about what a MILF she is.